Valentines Day

Ah Valentines Day. The day of hopes, expectations, expression, love and disappointment.

I was one of the women who totally and completely bought into the Madison Avenue spiel, hook, line and sinker. 'If he loves you you'll get a dozen roses delivered to your work, a box of expensive chocolates, lingerie or jewelry, a dinner at a fancy restaurant and champagne'. I literally expected ALL those things every year. Poor D. He had to not only live up to my expectations that were WAY out of proportion to reality but then he had to outdo himself every year. I can only look back and shake my head at myself.

It was a slow, very slow, process but I've changed. Valentines isn't 'just another day' for us but it's also not one fraught with pressure, tension and expectations. I don't desire anything other than a card and maybe a nice dinner cooked at home and to not have to do dishes. This year D has class till late so I will be glad to get a card. I made him one with my new card-making skills and I'm really proud of it. It ended up looking how I wanted it to and it says what I wanted it to say.

My battle is now how to make Valentines special for J without going over the top. I want it to be fun and different without being full of cheap candy and cheaper sentiment. I'd like to start making some Valentines Day traditions that we can repeat every year. We made a few cards for friends and while he was napping, I made some shortbread cookies which is definitely out of the ordinary. I've made him a card and we're going to a park with a friend. I don't know. It doesn't feel like enough. I need to find more to do. I wonder if it will be easier when he's in school and/or older when it becomes a day filled with more anticipation and excitement. I'm gathering ideas - I love the Valentines mobile here. The biggest thing though is to try to not to live my Valentines Day through him.