The way I used to be...

I regularly receive compliments on my hair. My stylist goes into raptures over how lovely the color  is. People will say "you have the prettiest strawberry blonde hair!'. I say thank you then protest "but you should have seen my hair when..." And, as they look at me with confusion and disbelief, I tell them how my hair used to be "flaming, Irish, really, really red".

Because this is how I used to look (yes that's Derek):

And this is how I look now:

 

 

That's quite a difference. That isn't blonde up there on top of my head, it's white. Pure white. The paper white of my Papa's (my grandfather) hair. I used to be a redhead. I mean, I'm still a redhead, but I used to be more of a redhead. It's hard to picture, without a picture. Even with a picture. I miss my hair - it was the defining part of me. It was a very large part of how I was known and how I was recognized. You could always find me in a crowd. Now...I'm...defined in other ways. I'm Jacob's mom. I'm Derek's wife. I'm the Crazy Chicken Lady. Hard to pick those out in a group.

 

I miss my hair. I could dye it, but honestly it never looks the same and what's the point? Just like my laugh lines and smile crinkles, I earned every one of those white hairs.

 

Instead I will learn to, somewhat grudgingly, embrace my increasingly white hair. I will love that I inherited it from my grandfather. I will continue to learn to define myself in other ways. Crazy Chicken Lady is a pretty good start. 



Have Mercy Chocolate Cake

Ohhhhhhh - cake. Chocolate cake. With thick dreamy frosting. I didn't want much for Mother's Day but I did want an intense, incredible chocolate cake. J is allergic to eggs and, since I actually wanted to share my cake, I needed an egg-free cake worthy of Mother. Yes, I AM a LOTR geek :)

Well if you're looking for a deeeevine egg-free chocolate cake it has to be Wacky Cake. Now I have no idea if the Depression era story behind it is true, but it's a great little tale for an awesome cake.
This cake is only as good as the cocoa that goes into it so don't make it with that Hersheys stuff - go deep dark and intense. I personally love Guittard's cocoa rouge for baking.

The buttercream recipe is from Smitten Kitchen and it's the best buttercream I've ever made. And you make it in the Cuisinart. How did I not know you can make perfect buttercream in the Cuisinart?!

**note - this cake is SO easy to make, it's perfect for little fingers to help with the mixing**

Wacky or 'Have Mercy' Chocolate Cake

Ingredients:
1 ¹⁄₂ cups all-purpose flour

1 cup sugar

3 heaping  tablespoons cocoa

1 teaspoon baking soda

¹⁄₂ teaspoon  salt

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 teaspoon apple cider or white vinegar

5 tablespoons canola oil

1 cup water, cold

1/2 cup chocolate chips (because why not more chocolate?)

 

Directions:

 

- Sift flour, sugar, cocoa, soda and salt.
- Make three wells in the flour mixture.
- In one put vanilla; in another the vinegar, and in the third the oil.
- Pour 1 c cold water over all and stir till thoroughly combined.
- Stir in chocolate chips.
- Pour into greased 8 x 8-inch pan.
- Bake at 350 degrees F oven for 30 to 40 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out with moist crumbs (not batter).
- Cool on wire rack.
- Frost when cool.

Chocolate Buttercream Frosting:

 

Ingredients:

2 ounces (55 grams) unsweetened chocolate, melted and cooled
1 1/2 cups (180 grams) powdered sugar (sifted if lumpy)
1/2 cup (4 ounces or 115 grams) unsalted butter, at room temperature
Pinch of fine sea salt (optional)
1 tablespoons cream or whole milk
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

 

Directions:

 

- Place frosting ingredients in a food processor and run machine to mix.

- Scrape down bowl then process just until smooth and somewhat fluffed.

- Scoop the frosting onto the cooled chocolate cake and swirl it around.

 

And now I want chocolate cake - good thing I have some frozen!!